Somebody Out There
by silvernatasha
Summary: In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness. BlaiseHermione. Complete.
1. Somebody Out There

**Title:** Somebody Out There (1/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** PG-13   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part One: Somebody Out There**

She had not even made it back to the Gryffindor common room before the tears had come. Leaning against a hard, cold wall, Hermione cried, hot tears falling down her cheeks. Slowly she sank to the floor, her knees giving out under the emotion.

In the dim light, she crouched there, sobbing, head in her hands. Taking a deep, ragged breath, she settled herself into a sitting position: it was no more comfortable, but she was no longer afraid that her legs would give way.

The war had started in earnest now; another victim had been added to the fatalities.

Angry with herself for letting herself get into such a state - she had to be strong, responsible, she had to be Harry's rock - she pushed her hair from her face with a trembling hand. Why had it happened? Why had it happened to _him_? It was not fair: nothing was fair. Not in love. Not in war.

Not in anything.

A split second and everything changed. Mourning became hatred. She hated the war. She hated the Death Eaters. She hated death. She hated Ron.

She hated herself for hating him.

This should not have happened. He should not have gone. But he had. Forever following in Harry's footsteps, the moment he stepped out of the Boy Who Lived's shadow everything had gone wrong. He had been foolish. He had been reckless. He had been so completely and utterly _Ron_.

"Why's it happening to be?" she asked aloud, voice fogged with more emotion than she would have wished. She, however, had not expected a reply.

"Maybe it's meant to be."

The Slytherin sat across the corridor was staring at her intently. Anger rising, she moved quickly, pinning him to the wall.

"How long have you been watching me?" she demanded. He did not even blink, eyes completely focused on her face. "Answer me."

"Years."

Confused by his answer she loosened her grip on his collar, and moved backwards. "What?"

He ignored her. "What happened to Weasley?" His tone was cautious, and he slowly reached into his pocket. He passed her a clean, white handkerchief. She took it gingerly, unsure what to make of this action.

"He's dead."

There was silence, the words ringing around the corridor. Hermione clapped her hand to her mouth. She scuttled backwards as realisation hit, her bare knees scraping on the stone.

"This isn't supposed to be happening," she whispered hoarsely. Saying that he was dead made it real. It made it more real than she wanted, and her tears came again. "This isn't right."

"It never is." Slowly, as if unsure of his own limbs, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer. Hermione buried her face in the crook of his neck, sobbing quietly.

They stayed that way for a long time. Eventually, Hermione pulled back. "Why are you comforting me? There's nothing that you can do to make it right," she said quietly.

"I can't make it any worse," Blaise whispered.


	2. One by One

**Title:** Somebody Out There (2/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** PG-13   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part Two: One By One**

Rain fell heavily on the blooming flowers in the courtyard, dripping down to join the puddles that were forming.

A single figure sat on a stone bench, fingers toying gently with the ornate penknife in his hand. He was drenched, wetter than he had ever been, yet he showed no sign of moving. He shook his head, trying to move his long, dark hair from his eyes; the rain had plastered it to his head.

Another person joined him, the rain already having darkened her hair. Strands clung to her pale face, but she did not seem to notice them. She sat beside him, wordlessly reaching up with slim fingers to brush the hair from his face.

"Do you ever think that things are meant to be?" he asked quietly. She did not reply, but instead prised the penknife from his fingers, allowing the blade to fall to the ground with a clatter.

"I know we all have our reasons why. But I…" she trailed off, her voice hoarse. "I don't understand how the power of one human being has gone and changed so many lives." She bit her lip.

As abruptly as the storm had started, the rain stopped, leaving the couple in silence.

"I'm sorry." Knowing exactly how inadequate her apology was, Hermione took his hand in her own smaller one, thumb gently rubbing across his knuckles. He looked at her, blue eyes tinged with curiosity.

"For Millicent," she said softly.

"You weren't the one who killed her."

"I know."

The clouds began to move across the darkened sky, sunlight breaking through and down into the courtyard. Blaise stood ending their connection and shrugging off his wet robes. His thin white shirt was almost transparent from the dampness that had seeped through his robes.

Spreading his arms wide, he turned his face up to the sky, trying to absorb warmth from the sun. Hermione watched silently, wondering what he was thinking. He was shivering, she could see that much, but his face was a picture of calmness, and she wanted him to open his eyes so she could see his blue irises.

When Ron had been killed, he had been there, comforting her, listening to her. Three months had passed since the day, and now Hermione barely recognised herself when she looked in the mirror. How could she still look the same when so much about her had changed?

As she looked at Blaise, she realised that she was watching Blaise leave the life he knew. His best friend, Millicent Bulstrode had been kidnapped during a Hogsmeade visit and killed. He could not be the same after seeing her lifeless body.

__

He'll be better some day, she told herself. _Not now, but some day._

"Hermione?" he asked, as a playful breeze began to press his wet shirt to his body. He was crying, tears blending with the raindrops on his face. "If I start to come undone will you put me back together?"

"Piece by piece," she replied.


	3. London Calling

**Title:** Somebody Out There (3/15)  
**Author:** silverphoenix  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE  
Part Three: London Calling**

"I'm going to London," she announced. "Next week." Blaise looked up from his copy of the _Daily Prophet_. No one seemed to care that she was sat at the Slytherin table anymore; the Gryffindor Princess and the Slytherin Shadow were friends and no one disputed that.

They were leaving Hogwarts forever in one week - the seventh years were considerably fewer than they had been when they had started as young, frightened first years. Now they were older, wiser and seventh years, but they were frightened still, although for a different reason. There was still uncertainty, the future ever more fragile than before. "You sure?" he asked.

"It's calling to me. It's probably not the safest place to be, but…" she seemed to lose her train of thoughts, trailing off. "This war is like an ice age, slowly consuming everything. And if an ice age is coming, I want to be in the middle of the fire."

The dark haired Slytherin regarded her carefully, thoughtful blue eyes never leaving her. "Are you looking for a flatmate?"

A smile lit her thin face - when was the last time she had eaten a good meal- "I was hoping you'd ask that."

"People might think we're more than friends if we live together."

"I don't care what people think."

"Not even Potter?"

At this question, Hermione's eyes flashed. "He thinks we're together anyway." She pulled a goblet of pumpkin juice towards her, swirling the orange liquid round, watching it intently with heavily lidded eyes. "I feel like I'm drowning here sometimes, Blaise. I need to get out of Hogwarts."

"We haven't got long now." He folded the paper in half, dropping it on the table. "You've just got to hold out a little longer." He paused. "Are you still going into Auror training?"

"Yeah."

"Do you think I'd get in?"

"I thought you weren't interested."

"I need to do something with my life," he told her quietly. "I don't want to spend my days living off my inheritance."

Hermione was not convinced. "But you _do _want to go into a particularly dangerous career? Not everyone gets accepted into the training."

"You seem to think you will."

"No, I don't. I'm afraid that I'm not going to get in. I have no other plans, Blaise, and if I don't get in…" She bit her lip. "I'll help you with your application," she told him.

"Thank you."

Hermione moved closer to him, resting her head against his shoulder in a familiar way. "I'm scared, Blaise," she whispered. Blaise put his arm around her, hand slowly caressing her arm. "I want to leave Hogwarts more than anything, but I'm scared that everything is going to fall down around me."

"If I keep telling myself I'm not afraid, I hope it'll be true." She smiled at this, putting down her goblet.

"I don't think that'll work for me."

After a couple of minutes of silence, Blaise asked, "Hermione?"

"Yes?"

"Can we live by the river?"


	4. Lost

**Title:** Somebody Out There (4/15)  
**Author:** silverphoenix  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE  
Part Four: Lost**

I have never kept a diary before. I have thought about it, but whenever it came to writing down my private thoughts and feelings I felt foolish, wondering what people would think if they read what I had written. This diary is different, however. I intend for it to be read one day; I intend for this to be a testament of what life was like during the War.

My name is Hermione Granger. I left Hogwarts nearly a year ago, where I was Head Girl and a Gryffindor. I am not sure if this is relevant to anything anymore. Currently, I am training to be an Auror. It is tiring, and there are days when I wake up and I just want to crawl back under the covers.

Sometimes I feel so lost, so alone. One of my closest friends, Ron Weasley, died over a year ago. My flatmate and fellow Auror trainee, Blaise Zabini, lost his close friend as well. Her name was Millicent Bulstrode, and she was a Slytherin just as Blaise was. I did not know her well, and I cannot even claim that I was on friendly terms with her. Nevertheless, she is gone, and I know that I can never fill the gap in Blaise's life that she left, just as he cannot fill the space that Ron left in mine.

Blaise is a good friend, though. He is probably the only person who can see me clearly through all the doubt that I - that we - are living in. Even after lost sleep, lost dreams, lost hopes, he is still there for me, but I worry that we will not make it through the war together. I worry that one, or even both, of us will die.

I do not want this to be the wizarding equivalent of Anne Frank's diary.

There is a dark cloud hanging over me - that is what it feels like, sometimes. It makes my head spin and clouds my thoughts. I cannot shake it off, although I try.

Do you ever wonder if your life is a dream and suddenly you are just going to wake up? Sometimes I hope that that is the case, but then I wonder; what would my real life be like? Would I be a Muggle - the Muggle I would have been if I had not received my Hogwarts letter? Would I be living a 'normal' life, attending university or working?

The reason I ask this is that I have been losing sleep recently. When I am in bed, in the darkness trying and hoping that sleep will consume me, I have time to think. Questions flood my mind, thoughts spinning in my head, and I find myself growing evermore philosophical.

I have made a resolution. I will come out the other side of this war. I will live a long and happy live. I will get married and have children. I will see this diary published.

I will live.


	5. Chasing the Sun

**Title:** Somebody Out There (5/15)  
**Author:** silverphoenix  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE  
Part Five: Chasing the Sun**

The seventh of July was the day that Blaise realised he was in love with Hermione.

There were no fireworks exploding; there was no warm glowing feeling that spread throughout his body making him feel safe and cared-for. There was no sweeping, orchestral music and there was definitely no heartfelt declaration of his love. It did not even surprise him. It was just so completely and utterly natural to him, as though he had known it all along. Perhaps he had.

On that day, he came home from training. Hermione was there already there at their flat as she was currently studying for a Stealth and Tracking exam. She was there, sat at the dining table, several books open in front of her as she diligently copied notes from the texts. Her neat handwriting already covered several sheets of parchment in a variety of colours of ink.

Sunlight shone through the window, creating a halo around her head. She sucked on the end of her quill, not even noticing his arrival as she mouthed the written words in front of her. It was so normal and it was something that he came home to day after day.

And Blaise knew.

She was the summer in the winter of his life. She was a sweet summer day, carefree and fresh and, for a moment, all thoughts of the War escaped him. She was the calm in the middle of the storm, and he loved her.

Blaise knew that he wanted to be with her forever at that moment, that he did not want her to go to waste - to be another casualty in the War. He wanted to make memories with her that went beyond friendship. She was already the last thing that he thought about at night, and the first thing that came to mind in the morning.

As she turned the page of her book, she glanced up. "Hi, Blaise. I didn't hear you come in." She smiled brightly at him. "How are you?"

Although he was tired and aching from the day's training, Blaise grinned good-naturedly. "I'm good. Thanks."

She looked confused. "Why are you staring at me? Do I have ink on my face?" She wrinkled her nose, rubbing it with her finger.

"No, your face is fine."

"Good." Hermione was relieved. Pushing her chair back and flipping her messy plait over her shoulder, she picked up the empty glass on the table. "Do you want a drink? I fancy cracking open a bottle of wine tonight. We could get Chinese," she suggested. "Or Indian? You up for a curry?"

"Curry sounds great," Blaise enthused, tugging off his cloak and hanging it on a peg on the wall. Kicking off his shoes, he added, "Nothing too hot, though."

Hermione nodded, walking out into the kitchen. "Red or white?" she called; Blaise heard the clink of wine glasses. She poked her head around the door. "We have both."

"White."

And Blaise knew there was no turning back.


	6. Dreaming in Red

**Title:** Somebody Out There (6/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** PG-13   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part Six: Dreaming in Red**

Watching her lying there, tossing fitfully, a sheen of sweat covering her, Blaise wished there was more that he could do. Hermione was one of the best Aurors that he knew; technically, they were not fully qualified yet, but she was still damn good. Being a good witch was not everything, though, and Hermione had been brought down by a fever.

St. Mungo's had classed her as 'non-critical' and instructed Blaise to take her home. They had far more important things to deal with at the hospital, and Blaise could see why they had refused to admit her. Blaise was scared. He had already faced down half a dozen Death Eaters with his flatmate and their fellow trainees, but seeing Hermione like this scared him more than anything else did.

He was helpless; he had been told that the fever needed to burn itself out. She was helpless; the fever had rendered her into a state of delirium and, as far as Blaise could tell, she had no knowledge of his presence at all. If she knew he was there, she did not acknowledge it.

Hermione moaned, turning, the thin cotton sheet that covered her, getting tangled up with her legs. Blaise moved carefully, trying not to touch her and pulling it off her. He bit his lip as he folded it, draping the sheet of the back of his chair. It was clammy, and he wondered if there was a cooling charm that would be safe to use on her. He did not like to use spells on her without her permission even when she was healthy and, now that she was ill, her emotions seemed to have kicked her wandless abilities into overdrive. Lights would keep flashing, objects would float metres in the air and then come crashing down to the ground.

"Blaise!" she exclaimed sitting bolt upright.

"Hermione," he breathed, but she did not seem to notice him as she slid back down to a lying position.

"Red," she mumbled, a shiver crossing over her. "Why is everything red?" Then she let out a forlorn, "Blood."

Blaise ran a hand through his hair. She was dreaming in red. He, too, had dreams that were tainted by that colour. Blood, curses, screams. Hermione's breathing was heavy and laboured, and Blaise reached for a cold, damp flannel. Gently, he patted her forehead with it and she sighed deeply, trying to move closer to the coolness.

"Come and take me away!" she screamed, arching off her bed, muscles tense. Blaise's breath caught in his chest, truly frightened, both for himself and for Hermione and what she was seeing.

Her eyes opened, and she stared fixedly at him, eyelids heavy and pupils unfocused. "The world is falling down," she whispered, as though sharing a great secret with Blaise. Carefully laying the cold flannel on her forehead, Blaise pushed her hair from her face; it was damp with her sweat.

"I'll pick it back up for you," he assured her. She nodded.


	7. Believing

**Title:** Somebody Out There (7/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** PG-13   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part Seven: Believing**

_Hermione keeps a diary. I was rather surprised when she told me, as I have always associated diaries with 'girly' girls, giggling over secrets and hiding notebooks under mattresses. When we were in our sixth year at Hogwarts, Pansy Parkinson nearly turned purple in the face when Millicent found her diary and read it._

Millicent is dead. Pansy is in Azkaban.

It is funny how things change.

After reading Hermione's - she told me to read it - I have been inspired to keep my own. Hermione intends for hers to be published, but I am not sure if that is the intention of mine. I always think of diaries as private possessions, and the idea of writing it to be read seems to contradict that in my mind.

It sounds foolish, but I would like to be a man who makes a difference in this War. I probably will not; I am just one soul in this dark world, but I try to make things right. We are given choices in this world and I, Blaise Zabini, am choosing to stand up and fight for what I believe in.

I am not a hero, nor will I become one. I will not have a day of celebration in my honour. I will not have a statue cast in my image. But I will be free. It seems so far out of reach at the moment, and I sometimes feel that my faith is constantly dripping away. I believe in myself.

The people who do not know him call Harry Potter a hero. They say that he will be the saviour of the wizarding community and the one who finally rids us of Voldemort. Those of us who are acquainted with the wizard know that he simply does what he has to do to survive. He is no more of a hero than anyone else is. For him, more than anyone else, it is a case of kill or be killed.

There was a time when I could not say Voldemort's name. Now I can. Things change.

As it stands, I wake up bent and broken from my Auror training and I wonder if this is my fate. Had there not been a war, had I not become friends with Hermione, I think that I would be happy to live off my inheritance. Even if that had happened, it would have been giving in. It was what everyone expected me to do. I could have fled the country by now - left this all behind me - but I did not. I chose to stay. I could not do that.

To flee would be to leave behind the people about whom I care. Hermione, for one. She would never leave England and I understand that. When the time comes, she will be at the front line, ready for whatever they throw at her.

When the time comes, I will be stood beside her, ready to give my life for hers.


	8. Your Hope

**Title:** Somebody Out There (8/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** PG-13   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part Eight: Your Hope**

"Hermione?" Blaise pushed open the door to the bathroom of their flat; Hermione had never been one to dwell on her appearance, but she had already been in there for over an hour and he was worried about her.

She was sat on the tiled floor, back pressed against the bath. In her hand was a bottle of the Muggle aspirin that she insisted they kept in the flat for emergencies. A single pill lay in the palm of her trembling hand.

"What the hell are you doing?" Blaise demanded, wrenching the bottle away from her. Knocking her hand, the small white pill skittered across the floor. She made no effort to stop him, turning her face up to him, eyes wide and glassy. "How many did you take?"

"None," she said quietly. The witch tilted her head to one side thoughtfully. "I thought about it. I thought about it a lot, actually." Hermione looked at Blaise, who had sunk to the floor beside her and was now sitting cross-legged. "What would you do," Hermione said, "if you had just one little pill in your hand that could change everything?"

Blaise chose not to answer this question. "Were you going to kill yourself?"

"This is all too much for me," she said desperately, moving closer to Blaise. She put a hand on his chest, her eyes meeting his. "I never asked for any of this, Blaise. I never asked to be a witch; I never wanted to be a part of a war." She closed her eyes, a pained expression on her face. It was only then that Blaise realised he had stopped breathing. He let out a ragged breath as Hermione continued. "I'm losing hope that my life is going to go back to normal and I can't take it anymore!" Her voice became shrill. "I just want to let go!"

"And topping yourself is going to solve that, is it?" Blaise asked her harshly. "I'm not going to give you any sympathy." He shook the bottle sharply at her. "You don't deserve sympathy if you think about doing something like this."

"I don't want your sympathy," she snarled, backing away from his. He grabbed her arm, knowing that he was bruising her.

"Look at me, Hermione," he commanded, dropping the bottle of aspirin so that he could take a hold of her chin and force her to look at him. "You've got to throw those thoughts away before you make a big mistake. I get that you've lost control, Hermione, I really do, but you've got to get back on track."

Hermione bit her lip. "What if I can't?" she whispered fearfully.

"No matter how much your hope fades, Hermione, I'll be there for you."

"Promise?"

"Of course."

A solitary tear trickled down her cheek. "I feel so stupid." Blaise smiled wryly, pulling her into hug.

"Even the best people have their off days," he told her.

"Even you?" she teased, head buried in his shoulder.

"Even me."


	9. Anything

**Title:** Somebody Out There (9/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** PG-13   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part Nine: Anything**

When you are training to be an Auror, injuries are inevitable. Those who are lucky - or unlucky as they may joke - enough to make it into the training are actually given a tour of St. Mungo's during their first week. By the end of their first year of training, they are on a first name basis with many of the Healers.

"Thanks, Mel," Hermione said, gratefully taking the scalding hot mug of tea from the Healer who was tending to Blaise. He was still unconscious.

"Are you actually going to go home tonight?" Mel asked; Hermione had long since dispensed with calling her Healer Moon.

"Tonight?" Hermione was confused, pushing back the sleeve of her robes to view her watch and slopping tea on the floor. Mel sighed, and with a wave of her wand, the offending liquid was gone. "I didn't realise what the time was. Are you going to kick me out?"

"Not until you've finished your tea. I've got a couple of other patients to check up on - I'll be back in a few minutes." She closed the curtain behind her as she left and Hermione turned back to Blaise, taking a sip of her tea.

"You know," she informed him, "if I'm moody in the morning because of my lack of sleep, I'm going to be blaming you." She watched as he shifted in his magically induced sleep, turning towards the window. His eyes flicked beneath their lids, and Hermione reached over to brush his dark hair from his eyes.

"I'm watching you dream, Blaise," she whispered to him. "Are you dreaming of me?" She paused; he was not going to wake until Healer Moon viewed his injuries as adequately healed. It was doubtful that he was listening to her.

"I'd do anything for you." She cradled her mug in her hands: they were trembling. "Whatever it takes, whatever you need. I'll be there." Setting her mug down on the table, Hermione rose from her chair and sat on his bed, taking his hand in hers. "You do realise that I'm right here in front of you, don't you? Why can't you see that you're all that matters to me anymore?"

It was not until a tear fell on her hand, wet and warm, that she realised she was crying. "You're my rock, but I'm still waiting for you to let me inside; to let me be _yours_ and catch _you_ if you fall."

"Are you in love with me?" she asked his sleeping form, knowing and glad that he could not reply. "Sometimes I think you are - the way you look at me, the way that when we hug, you hold on for just a moment more than is necessary."

"You talk about fate, Blaise. Do you think we were fated to be together? Am I the one thing meant for you and you for me? Is this love that I feel for you, Blaise? Because if it is, I'm terrified."


	10. Surrender

**Title:** Somebody Out There (10/15)  
**Author:** silverphoenix  
**Rating:** T  
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE  
Part Ten: Surrender**

"And then, just as we were about to so the assault course, Justin broke out in hives all over his face. It would have been funny if he hadn't been in so much pain." Hermione laughed at the memory, leaning her head against Blaise's shoulder. "Actually," she corrected, "it _was_ funny." Blaise sniggered at the thought of it; he had been busy working on the Concealment and Disguise portion of his exams.

He took a hasty gulp of his wine as she moved closer to him, her body pressing against his as they sat together on the sofa in their flat; if she carried on doing that, Blaise was not going to be held responsible for his actions.

"I think I've had too much wine," Hermione announced.

"I don't think I've had enough," Blaise murmured.

"Pardon?" Hermione twisted so that she could look up at him. "What did you say?"

Blaise kissed her. Surprised by his action, Hermione's glass fell with a thud to the flood, the red liquid seeping into the carpet. She responded willingly to his touch, soft beneath his fingers and breathless when she eventually pulled back. "We can't do this," she whispered.

"Yes we can." He placed his lips to her temple, and she drew a ragged breath. "I can't fight this off anymore. I surrender."

"It's just the wine talking." Her brown eyes reflected her fear.

"No, it's me."

"Blaise?" she murmured as his lips drifted lower down her neck. "Are you sure about this?"

"I've never been surer of anything."

"Everything will change." Her hand snaked behind his head, her fingers burying themselves in his dark hair. Blaise pulled back, his eyes meeting hers.

"I don't care. I need you now, Hermione. I crave you." He kissed her softly on the lips. "You're in my dreams, Hermione… well, do you want me to keep going." A gentle, shaking hand pushed her hair from her face. "I love you, and I've already come all undone."

The words he chose to use were not lost on Hermione; memories of Blaise stood, wet from the rain and crying… When she found the words to speak, her voice was a whisper; "I'll put you back together, piece by piece." She kissed him, knowing that she was crying, allowing herself to surrender to his touch; he was gentle, unsure, murmuring his love for her as he kissed her.

"Blaise?" she whispered. "Blaise?"

He opened his eyes; Hermione grinned at him. "Am I boring you?" she asked. "You fell asleep just as I got to the good bit."

Blaise sat up suddenly, his wine sloshing in the glass that he still held tightly in his grip and knocking Hermione to one side. His heart was beating hard; he could already feel bitter tears building. Hand trembling, he handed Hermione his glass. "I'm going to bed," he told her, voice harsh.

"You're in my dreams, Hermione…"

She looked confused. "Okay, see you in the morning, Blaise." Then, she added, "Sweet dreams."


	11. If Only

**Title:** Somebody Out There (11/15)  
**Author:** silverphoenix  
**Rating:** T  
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE  
Part Eleven: If Only**

"I have to do this now or I'll go mad," you announced. I looked up, confused, and was about to ask what you meant when you kissed me. I've been kissed before, but never like that. Never with that feeling, never with that… I don't know what it was, but did you feel it? I think you did, because you pushed away from me. You left. You knew that your kiss confused me, but you still left.

I'll never forget this night, and I don't think that you will forget it, either. I feel emotionless now, so detached; it's as though everything has suddenly become clear but, at the same time, everything is more confusing.

The thing that confuses me most is that I think that I'm afraid of myself. This is ludicrous, because that's the one thing that shouldn't confuse me. Even in the midst of this war, my enemies are not the ones I fear.

Is that irony? I'm not sure of anything anymore.

Is this love? Is _this_ the way of love? To confuse us, to drive us round the bend and make us mislead each other, ourselves, into thinking that it's not?

Would you describe our friendship as close? I would, yet that kiss, the thing that should have brought us closer than anything else, has just made me realise that we've been building up walls between us. I think they're glass walls; we can see through them but, in spite of that, we seem to be choosing not to do so. Glass cracks: don't throw stones in glasshouses.

Your kiss was a stone.

The glass is all coming down around our heads, and I need you more than ever, but you left and I don't know when you're coming back.

I shall be sleeping alone tonight, Hermione. If you come back, if you want to take a chance and try to make things right, I shall not stop you. I want to welcome you into my arms and into my heart and I'm tired of pushing you away and you pushing me away.

I'm just tired.

If only you'd given it a chance instead of running away. I won't hurt you; I could never hurt you.

If only I had been the one to make the first move. Would you still have run away? You're with Potter, aren't you? Crying into his shoulder and letting him tell you what a bastard I am. Let him. I'm the first to admit that I don't like the wizard a great deal, but I probably deserve it. I've been letting you slip through my fingers for too long and even Potter could see that there was something between us.

There _is_ something between us, isn't there? It's not friendship anymore and I don't think it can be again. Come back to me, Hermione. Talk to me. Tell me your fiction, tell me your lies: tell me that you don't love me, but just come back to me.

Please?


	12. When It All Falls Down

**Title:** Somebody Out There (12/15)  
**Author:** silverphoenix  
**Rating:** T  
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE  
Part Twelve: When It All Falls Down**

"What do you want me to say? Do you want me to comfort you, because I don't know how."

Hermione looked tearfully at Harry. "I know," she whispered. "I just needed to get out of there - I can't face him after…"

"After what you did?" Harry was ashamed of the shrillness in his voice. "You _kissed _him. Am I supposed to tell you that you shouldn't have?"

"Lie to me," she begged. "Tell me anything."

Harry beckoned her over, and she crawled into his arms, head on his shoulder. "He's a bastard. He's the worst thing that has ever happened to you." He paused. "Is this the right sort of thing?" She nodded meekly.

"Blaise is an idiot, he's vain, selfish and when he looks in your eyes he doesn't see his heaven. He doesn't love you." There was silence; it weighed heavily on Harry. "I can't do this, Hermione."

She looked up at him, eyes wet. "I know," she said quietly.

"I admit he's not my favourite wizard, but… he's _yours_, Hermione. You have his heart, and you're lucky to have him."

Hermione fiddled with a lock of her hair, twisting it around her finger. "You know I have to walk away."

"From this? Pretend you never kissed him?"

"One spell and he'd never know…"

"But you would," Harry said harshly. "God, Hermione, you…"

"No." Her tone was sharp. "Don't try to stop me and save me from myself - you've done enough of that in my life already." She took a ragged breath. "Even if something did happen between me and Blaise, when it all falls down I'll be in worse shape than ever. _That's_ when I'd want you to save me from myself, Harry. Not now."

"Who says it'll fall down? Who says that you and Blaise can't have your happily ever after? You have the foundation for an amazing relationship - anyone can see that."

"Because it _all_ falls down eventually, Harry." She wiped a tear from her eye saying, "No matter how good the foundations are, it falls down eventually."

He studied her carefully. "I thought I was supposed to be the pessimistic one," he told her.

"No," she replied, "that was Ron." She fell silent and Harry understood.

"That's it, isn't it?" he asked. "You don't want to admit your feelings for Blaise because of what happened to Ron."

"Don't," she warned.

"No," he continued. "You and Ron admitted how you felt about each other, and then he died. You're scared that that'll happen to Blaise."

"Stop it."

"I won't. You need to stop being so obtuse - telling someone your feelings isn't going to get them killed."

"It's not like that!" she protested fiercely, moving away from him.

"I think it is," Harry said, grabbing her arm.

"I ruined one friendship tonight," she warned. "Don't make me lose another one."

"That man is in love with you," Harry hissed threateningly. "I don't know why, but he is. You have to face that."


	13. Our Lives

**Title:** Somebody Out There (13/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** T   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part Thirteen: Our Lives**

It was gone midnight when Hermione Apparated into the flat, flickering candlelight making her shadow dance upon the wall. Blaise was sat in dim light of the living room, staring at the space where she had just appeared, his gaze encompassing her wholly. There was silence; they neither spoke nor moved for several minutes, eyes focused intently on each other.

"Is this love?" Hermione asked quietly, meekly.

He stood, but instead of replying moved quickly towards her, pressing his lips to hers. Her knees nearly buckled under her, and his arms snaked around her waist giving her support.

"Fate," he murmured into her ear. Her eyes were closed, breathing ragged.

"Are you sure?"

"We've got to believe there's a reason we're here," Blaise told her, fate an almost ever-constant belief of his. "A reason why we were brought together." Hermione's arms moved around his neck, pulling him closer as his hand slid up under her shirt, warm palm pressed against her back.

She kissed him eagerly, marvelling at her own self-restraint and that she had not begun to rip his clothes off. "I'm sorry I left," she whispered hoarsely.

"I know you are, but we can't let our fear divide us any longer."

"I'm still afraid."

He nodded. "I'm terrified, but I don't think that we can go on thinking that it's wrong to speak our minds anymore. We've missed out on so much already."

Hermione looked at him, brown eyes wide. "Tell me you love me," she whispered, needing to hear him say it aloud: to make it real, to make it more than just an understanding.

"I love you." The words had never felt so natural. He kissed her cheek, relishing in the feel of her body against his. He had waited so long for this - to hold her in love rather than friendship.

"Tell me you need me."

Blaise kissed her temple gently. "I need you," he breathed into her hair.

"Tell me… tell me that we can make this work."

"We can make this work," he assured her, stroking her curly hair. "We can do anything as long as we're together - we just have to have faith."

Resting her head in the crook of his neck, she mumbled, "Faith can be broken."

"Not if we don't let it. Look at me, Hermione. I have faith in you; you are the most amazing witch that I have ever met and I can't imagine being without you."

He held her quietly, not wanting to let her go; it had taken long enough to get her in his arms that letting go was not an option. "This is it, then," she said finally. "No going back."

"No going back," he agreed.

Hermione kissed him, fingers tangling in his dark hair. Breathless, she gazed up at him, and he knew what that look in her eyes meant. "Do you want to do this?" Blaise asked cautiously, carefully, not wanting to push her into doing anything.

"More than anything."


	14. For You

**Title:** Somebody Out There (14/15)   
**Author:** silverphoenix   
**Rating:** T   
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.   
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE   
Part Fourteen: For You**

Sunlight peeked almost cautiously through the curtains, as though afraid to disturb the couple in the bedroom. Hermione gazed up at Blaise, a sleepy, sated smile on her face. "Morning," she whispered.

"Morning," he echoed, savouring the feel of her bare skin against his.

She moved away from him, stretching. Still smiling, she said, "I never thought that I could love someone as much as I do you right now."

Blaise was about to reply when an owl fluttered through the open window, nearly becoming tangled in the curtains and spoiling the mood entirely. Both froze when they saw that it was a Ministry owl. "Blaise…" Hermione whispered, her eyes wide as she saw the colour envelope that it was carrying; black.

He nodded. "I see it." He quickly plucked the envelope from the owl and it left. There was no time for a relaxed morning in bed, enjoying each other's company as they processed the night's events. Instead, it was, "Where are my robes?" and, "Have you seen my wand?"

Word had been received from a spy among the ranks that Death Eaters were planning to attack Diagon Alley. All Aurors and those in training were to report immediately to the Ministry.

Their briefing was short, clipped, panicked. Nymphadora Tonks kept changing her hair colour through nervousness, first red, then blue, finally settling on a Union Jack before she made her locks black.

Blaise pulled Hermione to one side before they were about to leave for Diagon Alley. "Hermione, this isn't romantic and it isn't how I'd want this to happen, but we both know this is the big one, don't we? The one which we might not be coming back from?"

She nodded, not entirely sure what Blaise was saying to her, but understanding the sentiment. This was the end of it. They would either win or lose this war against Voldemort today, and there was a chance that either, or both, of them would die.

"Marry me."

"What?"

"I spent a long time pretending that I didn't notice that you were right in front of me, and I don't want to lose you, Hermione. Say you'll marry me, Hermione, make a promise that you'll come back to me; that you're there for me."

She stared stonily at him. "I'm there for you, no matter what."

"Do you love me?"

"Yes, Blaise. Of course I do, but this is just…" She took a ragged breath, the look in his eyes telling her that he was entirely serious with his proposal. If she were to follow her first instinct, she would being saying 'yes' a dozen times over, but, she reminded herself, practicality comes first. "After," she said quietly.

"What?"

Hermione looked up at him, willing herself not to cry. "You are the light that shines the way for me, Blaise. Ask me afterwards. When we both come back." She paused, biting her lip. "Give us _both_ something to come back for."

He smiled and kissed her. She Disapparated.


	15. Things Will Go My Way

**Title:** Somebody Out There (15/15)  
**Author:** silverphoenix  
**Rating:** T  
**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** In the middle of a war, there are going to be casualties. This is inevitable. When two people lose their friends, they come to realise that death is not the end of happiness.

* * *

**SOMEBODY OUT THERE  
Part Fifteen: Things Will Go My Way**

Crouching down in front of the grave, the cemetery quiet around her, Hermione gently reached out for the tombstone, her fingers delicately tracing the letter N.

"I'm getting married today," she said softly. "I thought you should know." Hermione smiled sadly. "My mother and friends are all telling me that I shouldn't panic, but I think that I'm the calmest out of the lot of them."

"I came to tell you… that I'm sorry. It's been three years since you died and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you died and I'm sorry this is only the second time I've been here since we put you into the ground." She hesitated. "I'm sorry that it was your death that let me find the man I'm about to marry."

Hermione sat down on the slightly damp grass, her legs crossed. "We would have been married, you know. If you had lived, that is. I see that now, and I hope you don't hate me for moving on."

"Do you watch me?" she asked. "Do you look down on me, guiding me? Can you see the future from where you are? Do I have a happy one, because sometimes I feel that all the answers to life's questions are all wrong and I'm hoping that I'll find out it was worth it all along."

She plucked a blade of grass, twiddling it between her fingers. "I wish you could be at the wedding, Ron; I hope you'll be watching. I know you'd want me to be happy." Her lips curled into a smile. "Harry's going to be my Man of Honour. Blaise has asked Mel Moon to be his Best Woman. We thought it was fitting - I think, sometimes, that she's the reason we're both still in one piece."

"Nothing seems to work out right, does it? I had to lose you to find him and I suppose that's why I don't want to believe in fate as he does. If this is fate, then you were fated to die so that I could be happy and it's not fair." The blade of grass dropped from her fingers. "Maybe, one day, things will go my way, what do you think?"

"In time, I suppose. Things always seem to happen to happen in their own time." She paused, remembering something. "What's coming will come and when it comes…"

"…we'll just have to face it," another voice finished for her. Glancing up, Hermione saw a sombre-looking Harry staring at Ron's grave. He looked down at her, a fond smile lighting up his face. "I thought I'd find you here," he told her.

"Is my mother running around like a headless chicken yet?" Hermione asked sighing, unfolding her legs. Harry held out a hand and helped her to her feet.

"Not yet, but it's getting that way." His eyes flickered to the tombstone.

"I wish he was here," Hermione said softly.

"We all do." Harry's voice was tight with emotion. "We all do," he repeated.

**THE END**

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you to everyone who has reviewed this fic. I hope you enjoyed it; it's now complete, and I must stress that there will be no sequel. I feel lthat you get to a point when you can't write any more for certain characters, and this fic was never intended to be anything other than fifteen chapters to correspond with the fifteen tracks on the album whose lyrics inspired me. Thanks again, 

_silvernatasha_


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